This is the text of Bishop John's presentation to the Today Seminar on National Stop Violence against Women.

26 April 2001

What does it take?Click here to download the full address as an Acrobat PDF file.[/page]

What does it take ...

... to STOP domestic violence?

As the Bishop of the Anglican Church in Tasmania, being asked the question 'What does it take ... to STOP domestic violence?', hits me with the awareness of how overwhelming the problem of domestic violence really is.

I am struck with the knowledge that within our churches, and within the broader community, domestic violence is occurring. That women and children are living in fear.

Recently, I became aware of the story of a lady who had suffered for years from domestic violence. She was married to a man who intimidated her both physically and emotionally, and along with her children, lived with constant anxiety and fear. Part of the problem for her was that her husband was a 'nice' man very much committed to his church and respected by everyone. To all intents and purposes they had a happy life.

When she finally tried to explain to her church the reality of the life she was living, some listened and some spoke to her husband. But because all appeared to be 'normal' and the husband was a 'nice' man who regularly attended church as well, people could not conceive the complexity of the situation. This put her in the position of feeling that she was not really telling the truth and that she was a bad person.

She eventually separated from her husband, but has felt since that no-one in the church ever really understood what was happening to her. What was worse, she felt that because they didn't believe her and because there was no real understanding, the problem will be repeated with her children who, having grown up in that situation, just think that domestic violence is normal. She is angry because she feels that the church does nothing to help in these situations, does not make people aware of what might be and is in no position to help save her children from repeating the same mistakes and pattern.

Yes, I confess that the church has often been far from helpful. The church has not always been there for survivors. We have not always believed. We have not always known what to do. In our uncomfortableness, sometimes we have drawn away from a victim when we should have been like Christ and drawn closer in love and support. We have not always acknowledged domestic violence for what it is.

As I stand before you today I come to say that I want to be part of what it takes to end domestic violence. When examining domestic violence we cannot overlook male power and privilege that openly or inadvertently sanctions violence against women and children. A challenge for our churches is to examine our history and to look to a brave future, a future in which we challenge our own presumptions of power and privilege.

Challenges within the church community include understanding what God wants from us. For example;

Sometimes we have misused the wonderful and liberating message of forgiving, and turned it into a heavy burden on victims, keeping them in powerlessness. &endash; We have put too little energy into condemning violence and holding offenders accountable. We have been silent when we should have spoken loudly. We needed to be stronger in saying that repentance by offenders involves much more than remorse and confession. It involves completely changing both attitudes and behaviour. As in Ezekiel 18: 30-31 God requires of perpetrators a turning from transgressions and completely changed attitudes and behaviour.

To be true followers of Christ, we must have a commitment to healing and change.

What can we do?

The church certainly needs to engage in frontal attacks on the problem:

• by recognising domestic violence, and talking about it in our churches.
• by condemning it as always wrong and destructive.
• by believing and supporting victims.
• by praying for those suffering abuse and those who abuse (see below).
• by challenging offenders from all walks of life to change - and then supporting and facilitating that change.
• by having a brave look at how male power and privilege is used in our society, in our churches and in our homes.
• by participating in a shift in community attitudes that challenges of the power that maintains domestic violence.
• by ensuring we don't misuse theology to permit the continuation of domestic violence.

But the church also needs to be involved in more 'back door', or 'preventative', ways as well. Recognizing the influence on this problem of unemployment and hopelessness; of family break down; of alcoholism; of poor relationship skills, of financial stress, the church also needs to be at work in these areas in preventative ways as well.

I am encouraged that various churches are involved, and that first steps have begun. Just to pluck out a few examples, I am encouraged that the refuge Jirah House exists - I am encouraged that Sister Phillipa runs sessions to help violent men face up to issues and change - I am encouraged that the Salvation Army works with those caught in addictions - and that Anglicare's work includes the domestic violence program 'Let's face it', and such things as financial and relationships counselling. I am encouraged that various churches and schools run sessions to help parents gain skills, and avoid those power struggles and impasses that can lead to family violence. I am encouraged by inter church workshops on domestic violence.

Part of our commitment is seen through our agency Anglicare, which has projects that are working with communities and people experiencing domestic violence. Communities that are loving, supportive and aware will start to challenge some of the power that maintains domestic violence. As church communities we can reflect on what Jesus would do, where he would turn. Jesus would be here with us, with the victim, supporting her to live her life in freedom and peace.

Yes we have made mistakes but we have also made some first steps. The challenge is that in the face of such an enormous problem: Can we keep pressing forward? Can we keep domestic violence on the agenda of our churches and our communities and our governments?

Today we have come together with a shared dream of a society and community that is free of violence.

• I thank you for this opportunity to meet together.
• I know I will learn from you.
• I trust we will support one another.
• I assure you of my prayer and work for truth, love and justice in our churches and in our society.

A Prayer for those suffering abuse

Loving God,
whose Son was both victim and victor,
we cry to you for those who suffer abuse,
(especially…)
Be with them in confusion and pain.
Heal the wounds of body and mind;
break open the prisons of fear, self-doubt and despair;
and strengthen them to face the future with faith, hope and courage.
Enable us to listen, to believe and to love.
Reach out to them with your love,
that they may be made whole in body, mind and spirit,
through the healing touch of the suffering Christ. Amen.

A Prayer for those who abuse

Judge of all the earth,
God of justice,
we bring before you all who abuse others.
Turn the hearts of the violent from the way of evil.
Fill them with a hatred of the damage they do,
so bringing them to true repentance
and amendment of their lives,
for Jesus Christ's sake. Amen.

(From A Prayer Book for Australia, The Anglican Church of Australia 1995.)

Bishop John Harrower 26 April 2001